#Grief from losing a #pet can be tough to navigate, not only for the #petowner grieving but for those wanting to support them.
A #pet comes into our lives in various ways and at different times and bonds so closely with us, and becomes an inseparable connection for at least a decade or more (in case of dogs)....
I have been fortunate to share my life with dogs since I was a child and these are a few things that have helped me during times of #loss and grief, when I had to say "goodbye"...and hope they may be helpful for you or someone you know.
We need to acknowledge the loss! We may be worried about saying the wrong thing, but saying nothing at all could make the person feel even worse. Mentioning their #pet isn't going to remind them of their loss...trust me, they're thinking about it all the time anyway. it's good to acknowledge how challenging daily routines must be for someone who has just lost their beloved #pet.
There are countless challenges that accompany a loss of a pet! Anything that can lighten the load in the daily life of the #pet-owner who is grieving, is helpful. Offer to grab them a coffee or lunch, ask if they'd like to go for a walk to get away from their familiar settings, and... maybe even a virtual check-in could do the trick, especially those first days and weeks of readjusting to a life without their beloved pet... And if you don't know how to help, it's ok to simply ask 'how can I support you?'...
Everyone's grief journey from losing a pet is very different and even if you've suffered a loss of a pet yourself, please don't compare! No relationship or connection is ever the same...Don't tell the person that 'time will heal' or 'it will get better' or 'they have just moved over the rainbow bridge' (I particularly hate this one!).
Often grief feels worse as time passes. It took me six years since the loss of my poodle before I could even consider getting another one! Of course, not one size fits all and not everyone grieves the same...For many though, losing a pet may be equally devastating as losing a person; cause the #pet may have been closer than anyone in the life of that individual. Advice can be well-meaning but know that there is no solution or 'getting over' grief.
Asking 'how are you?' or 'how was your weekend?" can be superfluous. Instead, we could ask, 'how has the transition without living with a pet has been?', or 'would you like some company/a chat?' In grief, everything can become amplified including common words/phrases that may come across as insensitive.
Acknowledge how hard it must be to sleep when grieving the loss of a pet; how empty their home and their bed and their life must be, especially if they live alone.
Getting up each day, showering and getting dressed is a huge feat in itself, especially when there's no more your best friend to walk with, to feed, to talk to, to pat and play with before showing up for work each day or getting out into the world and interacting with people. If they are caring for children or elderly/sick parents on top of their personal loss, the weight of this can be excruciating alongside their grief. Additionally, their family and their circle is simultaneously also grieving the loss of that pet!
If nothing else, be kind! Grief from losing a #pet is not something to be 'managed' but to be met with compassion and understanding.
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